MST#2 Part 2

Scene: PPC Theater. The lights are out, hiding from view the people sitting there. Again.
SERGIO: Everyone’s ready?
COROLLA: Yeah. Lights, please!
Three spotlights are turned on, illuminating the three Agents.
SERGIO: Welcome back to the PPC Theater! Today we’re going to spork the second, and luckily last, chapter of “Fate of heroes that crossed path with each other”.
COROLLA: Unfortunately, Nanoha isn’t with us today.
NIKKI: She had a little chat with the Sunflower Official. Rumors say that she befriended him.
COROLLA: Don’t worry! We managed to find a substitute!
Silence.
COROLLA: Not for the Sunflower, so stop holding your breath. Today we have a very special guest! She recently became one of the most worshipped deities here in HQ, and is also one of the few who actually know about the PPC, so if you pray to her she’ll listen! Ladies and gentlemen, the Concept of Hope and Goddess of Magical Girls, Madoka Kaname!
The last two spotlights are turned on, illuminating Madoka in her goddess outfit and Homura. The Puella Magi is hugging tight the goddess, eyes closed and smiling. Sergio hits her with an elbow.
SERGIO (whispering): We’re on air.
Homura looks around in surprise, then flicks her hair and her cold mask is back again.
COROLLA: We’ve also got Kyubey here again. You don’t know how much of a pain is keeping those two…
Corolla uses two holographic arrows to point at Sergio and Homura.
COROLLA: … from making him more holey than Swiss cheese.
SERGIO: He’s evil!
HOMURA: And screwed over thousands of magical girls. Including Madoka and me.
MADOKA: Come on, I changed it all! There’s no need to hold grudges anymore!

A countdown appears on the screen. 3… 2… 1…
SERGIO, NIKKI and COROLLA: We’ve got badfic sign!

Author’s note: This is my 2nd chapter
Author’s note: This is my 2nd chapter. Though this story has some adventures but it mainly focused on Nanoha and Yuuno relationship.

KYUBEY: Again with those useless repetitions?
SERGIO: Yeah, we know, it’s a waste of energy, you don’t get it, and you are even right.
COROLLA: Even saying that we should call the Department of Redundancy Department is starting to become redundant.
NIKKI: We entered an endless recursion of time.
Homura stares at her.
NIKKI: Sorry, I didn’t want to bring out bad memories.

And if people wonder why Caro is Fate’s child, I assume that she adopted Caro and Erio. Vivio will appear later in the story xD. Enjoy the story and remember to review.

COROLLA: I thought the relationship between Fate, Erio and Caro was rather clear already in the series.
SERGIO: Not as much as the blatant attempts to ship Erio and Caro made by the other characters, though.
MADOKA: But they are so cute together!

Disclaimer: I do not own Nanoha. T.T

SERGIO: We are glad you don’t.

Chapter 2

MADOKA: Uhm, didn’t the author say that already?
SERGIO: Yeah, in the Author Note. Twice. Insert random joke about the Department of Redundancy Department here.

“Mou, why are you so late? I have been waiting for half an hour. HALF AN HOUR you get it? You know how I feel about punctuality.” Nanoha said as they walked together.

COROLLA: It’s not like Yuuno was piloting the ship himself.
NIKKI: Then again, it’s not like Nanoha is this short-tempered…

“Haha, gome, gome. The ship’s engine has some problem so our flight is delayed. Anyway, it is great to be back here.”

Nikki, Homura and Madoka start waving their arms like Nanoha in the A’s scene where Vita mispronounced her name.
NIKKI, HOMURA and MADOKA: It’s “gomen”! “GO-MEN”!
COROLLA: Fangirl Japanese. Why does it exist?
KYUBEY: If your race had only one language, this problem wouldn’t exist, don’t you think?
SERGIO: Please, someone, kill him! He’s making sense again!
COROLLA: Mr. Someone is busy now. Please leave a message after the bip. Bip.

Yuuno gave a smile as he talked to Nanoha. “Beside, the most important thing is that I am back here isn’t it, Nano chan.”

SERGIO: Not the sappy romance again. Please.
NIKKI: And stick to Nanoha-chan, at least.

Nanoha sighed and said,” Yeah, that’s true I guess. You still have to submit your report right?”
Yuuno grinned at Nanoha expression. She just looks like a puppy, so cute.

COROLLA: Oh, please. Where are the Pink Beams of Firendship that made this series famous?
MADOKA: Uhm, I thought you wanted to say “friendship”?
COROLLA: No, Firendship. As in “Firepower”. You know, what Homura relied upon heavily until you rewrote the world.
SERGIO: And by “heavily”, we mean missile launcher trucks, anti-ship missiles and tons of C4 plastic explosives. Shame it wasn’t enough, but kudos for the attempt. Those were good fireworks.
HOMURA: Thank you.

He nodded his head which Nanoha gave a sad look and another sigh then he said,” But the process is quite fast. If all goes well, we still have time to have dinner together. Up for a date, Nano chan?”
Nanoha immediately gave a tight hug to Yuuno which shocked him and made him blushed and she nodded her head furiously.” Yes, of course I want. You can’t believe how long I have wait for this. Thank you, Yuu chan.”

COROLLA: Uhm, this report thing makes no sense. And more stupid nicknames.
HOMURA: If things worked that way, I would be calling Madoka “Mado chan” right now, and I am not.
MADOKA: I do want you to call me “Madoka-chan” though…
Madoka gets weird stares from everybody. The goddess blushes a bit and waves her hands.
MADOKA: When we speak in Japanese, I mean!

He scratched his head and gave an embarrassed smile after noticing many people staring and muttering about them. He hesitated for a second then slowly closed his arms around Nanoha and hugged her tightly. How warm her body is. I’m so glad to have you Nanoha; you are the only love in my life. How I wish that the time now can stop and allow us to be like this forever…

SERGIO: Enough with the badly written romance! I want Starlight Breakers!
NIKKI: And we have random POV changes too. Good thing this isn’t a mission.

After a few minutes, they broke off reluctantly with faint blushes on their faces. Yuuno then said,” Well, I got to hand in my report to Chrono or else he going to nag at me again. Why don’t we meet at….?” Nanoha put her finger on his lips and said with a smile,” Why don’t we have dinner at my house? I have some recipes that I want to let you try.”

COROLLA: Wait, why does he need to report to Chrono? Military and archeology aren’t the same thing. Unless he was investigating some Lost Logia or something, but I think he probably had enough of them after those pesky Jewel Seeds.
SERGIO: It’s an unwritten rule. You use Yuuno and want to be funny, you put in Ferret-Boy-Enslaving Chrono. Unfortunately, if you can’t do that well it does more harm than good. Poor guy.
NIKKI: Who? Chrono or Yuuno?
SERGIO: … Both.

Yuuno raised his eyebrow in surprise but seeing the determined look on her eyes which meant that she would not take a no for an answer, he nodded and leaned near her and said softly in her ears,” Ok then. 7 o’clock. I love you, Nanoha.” Then he gave a kiss to her forehead and walked off, leaving a blushing Nanoha staring at him.

SERGIO: Did she go from “serious” to “embarrassed” in ten second flat, just for a kiss?
MADOKA: Homura does that too.
Madoka kisses Homura on the cheek. The Puella Magi loses her cold mask and blushes.

Wow, he is so bold all of a sudden. What have happened to him? Oh well, i have to tell Fate chan now.

COROLLA: Badfic. That’s what happened to him.
NIKKI: Why does Nanoha need to talk to Fate about it like they were fourteen-year-olds on their first date? No offence meant to actual fourteen-year-olds.
HOMURA: None taken.

At someplace near them, Teana and Subaru (I decide to use back Teana or Tea and not Tia.)

SERGIO: There was no need to use an in-text note to tell that. Those are annoying. And, in fact, you didn’t need to justify your nickname change at all.
COROLLA: There are enough things wrong it this fic that we wouldn’t even have noticed.

smiled and gave each other a high-five. Subaru said,” Well, mission accomplished. I say that we must have exceeded expectation. Now, let us go and get our rewards from Fate.”
Tea laughed,”Yeah. I can’t believe that we can get free entry cards for any bars and pubs. Let us go paaarty.”

NIKKI: Uhm, I thought that you were supposed to report to Hayate for the pranks.
COROLLA: Fate is Hayate disguised, remember?
MADOKA: I haven’t been around for a while, but since when do you need to pay to enter in a bar or a pub?
SERGIO: Since never. Unless they meant fake IDs, and that would be too much even for Hayate. That’s illegal, you know?

At their apartment, Fate was not in a good mood. When she saw Nanoha with a happy expression on her face like she just struck lottery, she felt happy for her friend. That was until Nanoha told her to stay over at Hayate’s house for tonight as she wanted to have a date with Yuuno at their house!? Which couple would have dates in their houses? It sounded stupid to her and the worst thing was that Nanoha was cooking and she could not get to taste her dishes and that she was being driven away from her house.

NIKKI: I do believe that her cooking is good, but not so much to want to ruin your friend’s date in order to eat it.
COROLLA: Well, Fate is right about that not really being a date. She basically just invited him over for dinner.
HOMURA: But she’s not such a jerk to kick her best friend out of home just to have a “date”. Especially if said best friend is supposed to be her actual fiancee.
MADOKA: How do you know all of that?
HOMURA: Same English voice actor.
MADOKA: Oh.
KYUBEY: Homura Akemi, sharing knowledge this way isn’t possible. How did you manage to do that?
SERGIO: Kyubey, this place doesn’t run on laws of physics or logic.
KYUBEY: What? I just don’t understand!
SERGIO: You’re not the first.

Nanoha kept begging Fate even after she repeated her answer,” No” for umpteen times. Nanoha used all types of tactics such as the tear tactics which she pretended to cry and Fate response was to ignore it. She then asked her nicely but Fate rebuffed her. Nanoha then tried to reason with her but Fate answer seemed more reasonable to the extent that even Nanoha agreed with her. Nanoha then finally gave up and walked away,giving Fate a disappointed look that made her feel guilty. Finally, Fate gave up and said to Nanoha,” Oh alright. I will go to Hayate’s house to stay overnight and not disturb your precious date. Geez, you must repay me tenfold for my sacrifice alright?”

COROLLA: Oh, please. The more this fic goes on, the more immature they act. They were much more mature than that when they were just nine years old.
SERGIO: Should I go buy some pacifiers for when they become toddlers?

Nanoha gave a loud squeal and hugged her tightly, rubbing her face in Fate chest that caused her to blush furiously and gave a small protest but Nanoha ignored it. After a few minutes of nuzzling, Nanoha thanked her and quickly ran to prepare the dinner for the night date and Fate could only sighed and hoped that her sacrifice was worth it.

NIKKI: We are going to need those pacifiers very soon.
KYUBEY: Make a contract with me, and you can wish for them!
HOMURA: That won’t be necessary.
Homura pulls out of her shield several pacifiers and the book “Sarcasm for dummies”.
HOMURA: Read it, Incubator.

Fate sighed as she lie on the bed and stared at the ceiling. When will I find my love? Seeing Nanoha so happy like that, even I want to have a feel of it. Sigh…. Oh well, at least I still have Caro and Elrol with me. She played with her hairs as she continued to think of her non-existent love life. Fate then grabbed Bardiche gently and asked softly,” Ano Bardiche. Do you think I will ever be like Nanoha?” Bardiche answered,”Yes,Sir. Of course you will be. Don’t worry.”

SERGIO: The “Most In Character” prize goes to Bardiche.
NIKKI: I wasn’t even hoping anymore.

She smiled fondly at her life companion and her soul mate. Despite being an A.I, Bardiche displayed intelligence beyond normal A.I just like Raging Heart and to her, he is an unique A.I such that he could be considered as a living things and not programs.

COROLLA: Of course we are living things, thank you.
SERGIO: Corolla, you’re an Unison Device. Of course you are a living being. Bardiche and Raising Heart are in another class, so… Hey, that’s an interesting question.
COROLLA: Anyways, “Intelligence beyond normal AI” is the staple of their entire class of Devices. They’re called, guess what? Intelligent Devices. Do your Madoka-damned research.
MADOKA: … Eh?
COROLLA: … Whoops. I forgot that the goddess is right here.
Madoka sighs.
MADOKA: I guess I have to get used to it.

She then turned to look at the ceilings again and sighed. Oh well, at least there are only 2 couples I know so far.

NIKKI: Numbers written in digits. Lazy.
COROLLA: It’s not like we were expecting any better.
KYUBEY: Why? It is energy-efficient.
All the other five people facepalm.
SERGIO: “Completely Missing The Point” has reached impossible heights today.
HOMURA: That’s Kyubey for you.

Chrono and Amy and Nanoha and Yuuno. At least Hayate and her knights do not have any boyfriends yet so I am not the only person to have single status among my close friends.

NIKKI: I though she didn’t want one?
SERGIO: … Were you expecting consistency from a badfic?
NIKKI: In fact, I wasn’t.

Caro and Elrol look good together but they are so young. Subaru and Tea seem impossible and they remind me of the relationship between Nanoha and I. Ahh, my life is so BORING!!

HOMURA: While I am a different kind of Magical Girl, I find hard to believe she even has the time to get bored.
COROLLA: You hit that bullseye. And she also has a lot of friends to hang out with when she has some spare time.

Nanoha was humming a tune she made up of herself while preparing the ingredients for the dishes. She had been preparing for this day by badgering her mom, Shamal and Fate to teach her to cook.

NIKKI: I thought she already helped with the Midori-ya cafe when she was nine?
COROLLA: Not only that, but she usually is the one who cooks at her and Fate’s house. In fact, I’m not exactly sure Fate would be a good cooking teacher, too.
SERGIO: Wait a minute here. Didn’t you miss something here?
Everyone looks at him.
SERGIO: Shamal. Teaching how to cook.
COROLLA: Oh, for Madoka’s sake….
Homura and Madoka are quite lost.
MADOKA: Is her cooking so bad? And  I am right here, thanks.
Corolla answers by opening an holographic window., showing this photo:
Shamal's cooking

Though her culinary skill was not very good, it warranted a pass from her teachers and that was an indication that she was ready. Hmm, a five courses meal is enough for us.

COROLLA: If in this fic she was taught how to cook by Shamal, her cooking can’t be very good.
HOMURA (still looking at the photo): I believe it.
SERGIO: I would praise the consistency, if this fic had a single thing right. And Fate didn’t say before that she wanted to eat Nanoha’s dishes, implying that those were good, and so nullifying any consistence this thing gained.

Hehe, I can’t wait to see Yuuno’s expression when he see the dishes from a future culinary chef. Just when she was washing the vegetables, she heard a shout from Fate,”…. My life is so BORING!!” She almost dropped her vegetables and looked at their room with alarm. Fate has finally goes crazy?

SERGIO: She is currently possessed by Hayate and an Author Wraith simultaneously. Of course she isn’t right in her head now.

At the 6th division headquarter, Hayate and Chrono were listening attentively to Yuuno report. Yuuno said with a serious expression,” The recent trip to find that elusive Lost Logia seems successful on the surface but I discover something during the excavation that will be a danger to the world.”

COROLLA: Nothing is more dangerous than the Hide-And-Seek Lost Logia.
MADOKA: … I’ll never play Hide-And-Seek again.

Hayate asked anxiously,” What is it?” Chrono muttered,” I have a bad feeling about it.” Yuuno nodded to Chrono who groaned and said,” I find a Jewel Seed and it is not a normal jewel seed. Normally, jewel seeds are dependent on the users but this time this jewel seed control the user from within. You can say that this jewel seed corrupt the people minds and since we have never exactly understand about jewel seeds, I do not know what will happen if the jewel seed controls its victim.”

COROLLA: Yay! Uncanonical Jewel Seeds!
NIKKI: Some Mary Sue Factory must be mass-producing them. The guys at DoSAT have an entire room full of them.

Chrono rubbed his temples and said,” So you seal it and put back to its original place and try to forget about the whole things. Or you keep it, bring it back here for more research and try to convince us to agree with your actions?”
Hayate looked intently at Yuuno and he gave a rueful smile and shrugged. This action convinced Chrono of his choice and he glared at Yuuno and said,” Will you care to explain to me then why are you keeping such a dangerous things?”
Yuuno replied,” Well, such an opportunity is very rare seeing that most of the jewel seeds have been sealed by Nanoha and Fate. It will be a rare chance to understand more about jewel seeds that may help us in the future.”

NIKKI: And to do that, you have to let those thing threaten people. Makes sense.
KYUBEY: What are you saying? It doesn’t!
SERGIO: The concept of sarcasm is alien to our alien.
COROLLA: The Department of Redundancy Department called. They want their jokes back.

Hayate gave an exasperating look at him while Chrono’s glare intensified. He said calmly but his voice radiated anger,” Are you joking? It is dangerous yet you bring it back just for research. Don’t be an idiot! You are endangering many worlds through your actions. Yuuno, get rid of it now and save all of us the trouble.”

COROLLA: Exactly! Don’t bring to us the exact objects that we study and keep hold of. Just toss it into a hole, I’m certain no one will ever find it.
SERGIO: Still, he should have sealed it. Those things are as dangerous as a not-yet-hatched Grief Seed.
MADOKA: Good thing that I destroyed all the Witches that were going to hatch from them.

Hayate nodded but Yuuno shook his head and replied,” No, it is not confirmed that it poses a danger to other people.

HOMURA: Because something that takes over your mind is perfectly harmless.
NIKKI: Well, this fic does say that Shamal’s cooking is good…
KYUBEY: This story is completely illogical. I don’t understand how it was supposed to be pleasant to read.

Trust me Hayate and Chrono. I will make sure that the jewel seed will not caused any troubles for us. Any sign of danger and I will immediately permanently sealed it and locked it away. Please, allow me to keep the seed.”

COROLLA (doing her best impression of cub eyes): Pleeeease? I’ll feed it and love it and call it George!
MADOKA: … I want to hug her.

They looked at each other for a while before Hayate sighed and said,” Alright Yuuno, we trust you not just because you are our friends but because we trust your words.” She then narrowed her eyes and said,” If I ever find out that the seed causes any trouble, I make sure that it will be gone from our lives forever. Mark my words, Yuuno.” Chrono was surprised at Hayate harsh words but Yuuno seemed satisfied at her answer. “Alright, may I be dismissed now? I got something on.”

SERGIO (Imitating Yuuno): I left the kettle on the stove. Gotta run.
KYUBEY: Why aren’t you going then?
HOMURA: When I told you to read that book about sarcasm, I meant it.
KYUBEY: I’ll never understand humans.

Chrono nodded and Yuuno walked out of the room swiftly, not caring to talk to them any longer. Hayate gave a worried glance at Chrono who mused over it. He then said,” Tell Nanoha and Fate to observe him. My instinct is screaming at me that there is something wrong with him” Please, let everything be alright.

COROLLA: Well, there is something wrong with him…
ALL: BADFIC!
KYUBEY: That was an amazing show of coordination.

Yuuno reached his office which Hayate had given it to him, citing an excessive amount of space left in their head quarter. He locked the door and slumped onto the ground with a groan. He gritted his teeth and panted heavily. He muttered,” Soon, I will get rid of you. I swear with my life….” The right side of his chest radiate a black glow and there was an imprint on that area. An imprint of a jewel seed.

NIKKI: Totally not foreshadowing a Possessed!Yuuno.
SERGIO: Since he was already possessed by an Author Wraith, does that make him Possessed!Possessed!Yuuno?
COROLLA: I am seriously thinking that this MST would have been better suited for the Department of Redundancy Department.

At Nanoha and Fate house, Fate grabbed a small bag which contained all the necessities and headed towards the kitchen. Immediately, the fragrance of the dishes hit her nose and her eyes widened. She dropped the bag and ran into the kitchen, praying that she was on time.

MADOKA: I thought she wasn’t going to eat there?
SERGIO: We all did.

Finally, a scene greeted her which was Nanoha sitting on the floor with tears flowing down her face. She looked up at Fate and said,” What am I going to do now, Fate chan?”

COROLLA: OMG! A cliffhanger! What could have happened?
SERGIO: A stupid and illogical plot. I’m glad this thing is over.
Madoka sighs in relief.
MADOKA: Maybe I should have wished for the end of bad fanfiction too…
KYUBEY: Unfortunately, even your impressive karma wouldn’t have been enough.
NIKKI: Even hers? Badfics are truly the biggest menace out there.
SERGIO: Look at the bright side. There’s no way we can be fired for lack of work.
COROLLA: That’s something, I guess. I’m not sure if it’s a good thing, though.
HOMURA: You have my sympathies.
The group gets up and exits the theater. Oddly enough, no Kyubeys are killed.

Advertisements

MST #2 Part 1

Thanks to Firemagic, who probably became my official beta reader for pretty much anything.

Scene: PPC Theater. The lights are out, hiding from view the people sitting there.
NIKKI: So, what are we supposed to do here?
SERGIO: Watch a badfic like a movie. On the bright side, it’s mostly safe. But we don’t get to kill the thing after it.
NIKKI: And the reason for doing that?
COROLLA: I don’t know. Something is for punishment, but we didn’t do anything out of the rules lately. Maybe it’s for the Flowers’ own entertainment, since we have to act like the hosts of a TV show.
SERGIO: We get to snark as much as we want, though.

Three spotlights are turned on, illuminating Agents Sergio Turbo, Nikki Cherryflower and Corolla.
SERGIO: Welcome back to the PPC Theater, folks! Today, we’ll spork a badfic called “Fate of heroes that crossed path with each other”, of a guy that goes by the name of xavier12336. We do not claim to own this trainwreck, and we would be ashamed if we did.
COROLLA: We also have some special guests today! They are two of the most badass Magical Girls in the Word Worlds, and in fact they are two contestants for the “Most Destructive Magical Girl of 2012” award.
NIKKI: The only two contestants, actually. I heard that all the others retired when they heard that this year both of them were featured in movies. Something about “not having a chance”, I think.
COROLLA: Let’s introduce them! In the pink corner, we have a Magical Girl who traded her magic wand for a magitech shape-shifting cannon! A girl whose best definition is “RX-78-02 Gundam in a schoolgirl’s dress”, and has been called the White Devil even by her own fans! A girl who had to be locked into her least powerful appearance in order to let her in HQ! A girl whose Pink Beam Of Friendship can erase ENTIRE CITIES! WITH A SINGLE SHOT! Ladies and gentlemen, the Ace of Aces of the Time-Space Administration Bureau, Nanoha Takamachi!

Another spotlight is turned on, illuminating Nanoha in her 9-year-old body and dressed in her original Barrier Jacket. She gets up and bows to the invisible audience.
NANOHA: Pleased to meet you.
She sits again.
COROLLA: And in the purple corner, we have a Magical Girl who traded her magic wand for military hardware instead! A girl who fights in the most hostile Magical Girl series known to man! A girl awesome enough to be able to stop time! A girl who faced one of the most powerful monsters of the Word Worlds ALONE! SEVERAL TIMES! TO SAVE HER BEST FRIEND!
SERGIO: And would have even won, if Kill-Them-All Urobuchi wasn’t a jerk who can’t write an happy ending to save his life.
A sign springs up behind them. “The author of this MST wants to remind that his Agents’ opinions don’t reflect his own” is written on it.
COROLLA: Ladies and gentlemen, the Time Traveling Puella Magi, Homura Akemi!

The last spotlight is turned on, illuminating Homura, dressed in her Puella Magi outfit. She gets up and silently bows to the invisible audience. In the meanwhile, a white cat-rabbit-like animal jumps on an empty chair.
???: Why are we doing this? None of us will gain anything from it. I just don’t get it.
SERGIO: And this is the evilest alien Magical Girl mascot ever, Kyubey. We tried to keep him out from this, but an application of lead equipped with kinetic energy wasn’t enough to convince him.
COROLLA: For those who didn’t get it, Sergio and Homura shot him. Several times. Despite the fact that we have not one, but TWO rules forbidding it. On top of the “don’t kill canons” one.
NIKKI: Alright, it’s time to start!

A countdown appears on the screen. 3… 2… 1…
SERGIO, NIKKI AND COROLLA: We’ve got badfic sign!

Fate of heroes which cross path which each other
Fate of heroes which cross path which each other.

KYUBEY: Writing the title two times is a waste of energy. I don’t get it.
HOMURA: We don’t either.
COROLLA: That’s what the Department of Redundancy Department is all about.
NIKKI: …We have an entire department for it?

Chapter 1.
Author note’s: This is the first time I am writing MSLN fan fiction so hopefully; you all will enjoy my story.

NIKKI: Why I have the feeling that we won’t?
COROLLA (imitating the author): ALL YOUR LIKES ARE BELONG TO ME!
SERGIO: You know, I think they are actually supposed to be owned by the note.

This story is mainly about Yuuno X Nanoha and Fate X OC and perhaps other couples like Elio and Caro set in Nanoha Strikers…

NANOHA: What? But… Fate and I live together! We are raising Vivio together! We even share a bed! Yuuno is barely appearing anymore!
COROLLA: Yuunoha fans can be pretty illogical. Word of God says that the canon pairing is NanoFate, and yet a lot of them are still at it.
KYUBEY: Actually, your entire race is illogical.
COROLLA (raising an eyebrow): I’m not exactly an human, you know?
SERGIO: I don’t know if this fic is putting together Yuuno and Nanoha to let the OC have Fate or is using the OC to keep Fate out of the way of the Yuunoha pairing. And it doesn’t even matter, ‘cause it’s bad in both ways.

I intend to make this story to be a long series just like Satashi’s story: Saved by the Bell which I love reading it due to its very long length and its wonderful story line. Please R and R.

COROLLA: Yay! Shameless publicity! By the way, our author wants us to suggest reading Shadow Crystal Mage’s stories. Where crack and serious storylines meet.
SERGIO: Long series? Please don’t. A Moemura dies every time a chapter of a badfic is posted. Please save the Moemuras.
Homura stares at him.
NANOHA: R and R? What does that mean? Rock&Roll?
Corolla pulls out an holographic guitar and starts playing “Born To Be Wild”

Nanoha Takamachi was preening herself in front of the mirror by twirling around, allowing her long brown hair which were tied into a ponytail to swing around.

NANOHA: My hair’s not a whip, thanks. Fate still shivers around those.

She then hummed a tune while applying some make-up on her face after making sure that she looked presentable in the clothes she had chosen which was a white blouse with a picture of a ferret and a speech bubble that said:” You are so cute!!” and a mini-skirt that displayed most of her legs.

NANOHA: What.
NIKKI: Fanservice ahead. The same reason they make us Magical Girls wear short puffy skirts while fighting midair. IT’S QUITE EMBARRASSING, YOU KNOW?
HOMURA: You should start wearing tights too. Or bike shorts, if you fancy those.
NIKKI: … That’s a very good idea, actually.

Today was the day that Yuuno Scrya came back from his expedition after travelling to some distant planets for research and after separating with him for six months, the longing for him was barely contained in her.

NANOHA: What? No!
Nikki pats her on the shoulder.
NIKKI: I know that feeling. They tend to pair up Sakura and Tomoyo a lot, you know?

Despite being the Infinite Library librarian, he would still go on archaeological trips to maintain his passion for relics and nobody dared to deny his request due to his vital position except Admiral Chrono and Hayate. Nanoha and Yuuno had just being a couple for a month before Yuuno embarked on his trip and Nanoha hoped that their relationship would progressed when he came back.

COROLLA: I’m having soul pains. This barely sounds like Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha at all.
NIKKI: In fact, even the grammar doesn’t sound like grammar at all.

Being each other first love, many people such as their good friend, Fate, Hayate, Signum and Chrono had been trying to pair them up but they preferred to focus on their work to the frustration of their friends.

SERGIO: People don’t try to pair up other people. It’s just rude. And I’m not talking because I was victim to this.
NIKKI: You were?
SERGIO (unconvincingly): No!

Then when Yuuno finally plucked up his courage and asked Nanoha to be his girlfriend which she made a big scene of crying before accepting his confession they then became a couple and ended the suffering of their friends.

COROLLA: Great, when did Nanoha became Marmalade Boy?
NANOHA: I need a freaking drink.
Homura pours two glasses of wine and gives one to Nanoha. Sergio snatches both of them from their hands.
SERGIO: I thought you were both underaged?
NANOHA: Technically, I was 25 before being dragged here…
HOMURA: And I’m not human anymore.
The two Magical Girls take their glasses back.
SERGIO: You know what? I’m not going to take them again. The Flowers are much less of a threat than those two.

Nanoha grinned as she finally put on her make-up which was relatively simple due to Yuuno telling her on their first date when she put on heavy make-up that she looked beautiful without any make-up.

NANOHA: Heavy make-up? Me?
COROLLA: The Department of Redundancy Department is going to have a field trip with this one.

Still, she could not resist the urge and put on light make-up as they could finally reunite with each other. Nanoha then grabbed her handbag and Raging Heart which she put carefully in the handbag and she exited Fate and her room with a very happy face..

NANOHA: I… Exited Fate? What is that supposed to mean?
SERGIO: …I hope it doesn’t mean what I think it means.
KYUBEY: With my knowledge of human language, I am sure this is a figure of speech for-
Homura shoots Kyubey. Another one pops out and eats the corpse.
KYUBEY: I don’t get it.
SERGIO: We are trying to keep this kid-friendly, you know?

Fate was drinking orange juice and watching television on the couch and Nanoha smiled when she saw Fate. What would be the people reaction when they saw the famous battle mage, Fate Testarossa who had completed more missions in history than anybody, slouching at the couch. Nanoha greeted her,” Ohayo, Fate chan. Mou, don’t slouch like that. Your back will be sore at night”

COROLLA: Yay! Fangirl japanese!
NANOHA: Fate’s a very good Enforcer, but she didn’t do this many missions this far. And I think that she can take a bit of a rest once in a while, although slouching doesn’t sound quite right for her.

Fate managed to extract herself from the couch and gave a mock salute and said,” Yes Instructor Takamachi. I will review my action and change them accordingly.”
Nanoha chuckled and she strode towards Fate and stuck out her tongue at her. She then said,” Stop it, Fate chan. It is enough with the students especially Tia, Subaru, Eriol and Caro calling me that everyday. Anyway, I’m going out so take care of your dinner.”

COROLLA: That response is actually more in character for Hayate, I think.
NANOHA: And Fate doesn’t need me to tell her to prepare dinner if I am not home.

Fate surveyed her from head to toe and gave an impressive look. She then said,” Well well, my dear Nanoha have learn to make herself beautiful. Dear God, she is going to leave me alone and lonely soon. Why me…”
She gave a sad look and pretented to wipe away an imaginary tear while Nanoha laughed.

COROLLA: I correct my previous statement. This is Hayate disguised as Fate.
NANOHA: … Can’t argue with that.

She tilted her head to one side and said while playing with with her ponytail,” Aww, I won’t leave Fate chan lonely and sad. My dream is that I want to have a wedding together with you so please hook up a boyfriend and brighten your love life just like me.”

SERGIO: It’s not like she can summon a boyfriend out of thin air, you know?
NANOHA: The author thinks that I don’t know that, apparently.
KYUBEY: Your species’ mating rituals are unneededly complicated. I don’t understand them.
NIKKI: Wait until you see how our “mating rituals” are warped in badfics. That is incomprehensible.
HOMURA (glaring at the invisible audience): I don’t want to rape Madoka, I don’t want her panties, and I don’t spy her while she bathes. Stop writing about me doing that.

Fate rolled her eyes and said,” No way. I don’t even plan to get married in my whole life Nanoha so I guess you can forget about your dream. I already got Elriol and Caro already so you can happily get married…. Wait a minute, you have already advance this far with Yuuno? That’s fast for you two.”

NIKKI: Wait, being the legal guardian of two children has nothing to do with not wanting a boyfriend or husband. It’s a different kind of love.

Nanoha blushed and smiled faintly. “Well, we have not go this far yet. We never have out first time together yet….. Sometime, I wonder if Yuuno is more suited to be a girl due to his personality and his look.” Nanoha sighed as she grumbled and Fate grinned at her best friend. Yuuno indeed had a girlish look which attracted unwanted attention from people and intense jealousy from Nanoha but still, he was still one of the most reliable people in the world though not that Fate would admit that. Despite being a support mage, Yuuno had displayed great aptitude for combat if needed but it was very rare.

COROLLA: Well, Yuuno does have a bit of a girlish look… But his personality isn’t. And he doesn’t have much of a combat aptitude.
NANOHA: I don’t want to be mean to him, but if he was a very good combat mage he wouldn’t have needed to ask me to help him during the Jewel Seed Incident.
NIKKI: And why would Fate deny Yuuno’s skills? It’s not like they have a grudge or something.
SERGIO: Badfic does that to you. Maybe she’s blaming him for the mess.

In the transport ship from the archaeological trip, Yuuno sneezed suddenly.

COROLLA: Bless you.

After ranting about her poor boyfriend, Fate urged her to go to the destination quickly and after Nanoha gave a gasp and dashed to the place, Fate lied back on the couch and continued to watch television but unknowingly, she  attached a micro camera on the front of Nanoha blouse. She then grinned to herself, happy at her cleverness.

SERGIO: Oh, for Madoka’s sake. This is Hayate all right.
Homura raises a brow upon hearing Madoka’s name used like the one of a “regular” saint.
HOMURA: I hope this Hayate girl doesn’t meet Sayaka on her good days. I don’t want to know what they can do together.
NANOHA: … This Sayaka groped you?
HOMURA: No, but she likes teasing Madoka. My Madoka.
Homura gets weird stares from everybody in the theater.
NANOHA: Homura-dawg?
COROLLA: The cool and cold Homura Akemi and the White Devil watched Madoka Abridged. The world’s going to end.
SERGIO: Again with this 21st December 2012 nonsense?
HOMURA:… It actually was more of “Our English voice actor watched it.”

At the terminal where the Exploration team was alighting, Nanoha walked around impatiently. She kept looking at the watch which Fate gave her and muttering about the treats Yuuno owed her until Raging Heart, an A.I which was Nanoha soul-mate though she was technically a machine, said,” Be patient, Master.”

COROLLA: The return of Raging Heart, Raising Heart’s evil twin!
NANOHA: So, I am engaged to Yuuno but Raising Heart is my… soulmate? It sounds like… like…
Nanoha downs the entire glass of wine in a single gulp.
RAISING HEART: [It’s all right, Master. This story is not true.]

Nanoha ignored it and continued to do the actions as mentioned above. Never a patient woman, she hated people being late and would snap at the offenders though her temper would subside as fast as it was flared up. Even Fate would be the unfortunate victim to suffer Nanoha scoldings but Nanoha would patch up with her after a short while with her trademark laugh.

SERGIO: …What. I know, she’s called the White Devil, but she’s not that bad.
NANOHA: Is this author trying to ruin my reputation or something?
COROLLA: You did blast Teana into next week, though.
Nanoha sighs.

Nanoha finally chose to sit down and spent the waiting time to muse over the various activities she going to do with Yuuno. “Hehe, Yuuno better prepare to empty his bank account when I am through with you.” Nanoha gave a devil smirk as she leaned back on the wall. Then she heard an announcement magically amplified,” Flight 2336 is alighting at terminal 12. Nanoha Takamachi, please go there now.”

NIKKI: Uhm, I thought you weren’t into shopping much?
NANOHA: At all. And when I actually go shopping, I do it with my own money.

Nanoha quickly grabbed her handbag and sprinted towards terminal 12, not caring about the suspicious announcement. At some place, Tia and Subaru laughed at their antics.
“Man, I cannot believe we actually do that.”
“Well, if she find out we can place the blame on Fate san.”
“Hmm, true..”

SERGIO: Hayate must be teaching Pranking 101 to everybody in this fic.
NANOHA: The bad thing is, I can totally imagine her doing that.

Nanoha then reached the terminal and peered through the glass wall that separates the passengers and the visitors. She waited for a while tapping at the glass wall and finally, she spotted the familiar youthful and girlish face with golden hair tied by her ribbon into a ponytail like her. That person carried some luggage and walked out of the passenger area while chatting with some people.

NIKKI: Her? When did Yuuno become a girl?
NANOHA: I wonder how he would look like as a girl…
After a bit of thinking, everyone except Kyubey starts laughing hard.
KYUBEY: I just don’t understand.

When he finally spotted Nanoha looking at him with tears threatening to leak from her eyes, he gave a startled look but that turned into a smile when she ran towards him and hugged him tightly.

COROLLA: Totally not ripped off from… well, every cheesy romantic movie involving an airport, I guess.

Yuuno whispered,” I am home.”

NIKKI: This isn’t home, this is a badfic.
NANOHA: Yuuno? Jump back on the plane, now!
The screen goes black.
NANOHA: It’s over. I’m very relieved.
COROLLA: Er… It isn’t. We just finished Chapter 1.
KYUBEY: There is more of this? Both writing this stuff and watching it were only a waste of energy. I just don’t get why you humans do that.
SERGIO: I agree with you.
Sergio blinks a couple of times.
SERGIO: I am agreeing with Kyubey. The world IS going to end.
The lights go off.
COROLLA (sarcastically): Thank you. We were still speaking here.

To be continued!

MST# 1

Scene: PPC Theater. Two agents enter. They are Sergio Turbo and Corolla, from the Department of Floaters.
COROLLA: I was right about getting more charges, I think.
SERGIO: Well, technically they were enough. But the Floating Hyacinth wants us to get as many charges as we can. I think this is our punishment.
COROLLA: So, we have to see a badfic on this screen, just like a movie?
SERGIO: Yes. But this isn’t going to be an enjoyable one
They sit down, and the projection begins.

Detective cone meets fullmetal alchamist

SERGIO: Two titles wrong out of two. Nice beginning, man.
COROLLA: Besides, what’s a “detective cone”? Something like that?
Corolla opens an holographic window. It shows a traffic cone dressed like a stereotyped Sherlock Holmes.

One day conan got uo to see if there was a case to solve and officer megirue brought him to a portal.

SERGIO: So, now portals spawn randomly across Tokyo.
COROLLA: I think they already have enough troubles with all those earthquakes. And big monsters. And giant robots. And magical girls.
SERGIO: And badfic authors. Do not forget them.

“So when did you notice this?” Asked Conan.

“Just this morning.”Said Officer megurie.

SERGIO: Two times Megure was mentioned, two minis. It’s a record?
COROLLA: Not quite. It’s not on My Immortal levels.
SERGIO: Give it some time. It sounds quite promising.

Conan walks up to the portal.

“Wait are you planning to go through that portal? Asked officer megurie.

“Of course.” Said Conan.

SERGIO (imitating Conan): I’m the best detective of the world, and so I do things that even a five-years-old would find dangerous and stupid.

“Well be careful.” Said officer megurie.

COROLLA: Looks like the author thinks “megurie” is the right name.
SERGIO: And since “megurie” sounds like the Italian word for “watermelon”, I am currently experiencing the mental image of a watermelon dressed like Megure.
COROLLA: You know that you’re not normal?
SERGIO: Yes. Just like everybody here in HQ.

“I will” Said Conan and he went through the portal soon he was in a place he didn’t reconize so he was started looking around but he wasn’t looking where he was going and bumped int someone.

SERGIO: Any clue on what this mess is meaning?
COROLLA: Nope. My spellchecker kinda shorted out.

“Oh i’m sorry may I help you up?” Asked a boy.

When Conan saw a hand reach out he looked up too see a boy with blonde hair black shirt black pants and red jacket trying to help him up.

Conan grabbed his hand and the boy helped him up.

COROLLA: I was going to call the Department of Redundancy Department to help him up.

“Sorry about that.” Said the boy.

“Actully it was my fualt I wasn’t looking where I was going.” Said Conan.

“My name is Eaward erlic.” Said Ed.

SERGIO: And the author got the “Misspell Ed’s Name Award.”
COROLLA: Cool one.

“My name is Conan edogawa.” Said Conan.

“Well It’s nice to meet you so I noticed your magnafying glass are you planning to be a detective when you grow up?” Asked Ed.

SERGIO (imitating Edward): I’m a detective too, since I discovered that you are a detective only from your detective-like magnifying glass.
COROLLA: This imitation has been brought to you by the Department of Redundancy Department.

“I’m already a detective.” Said conan.”

“That’s impossible yu’re just a kid.” Said Ed.

“Wait yu’ve never heard of me?” Asked Conan.

COROLLA (imitating Conan): I am still not of inter-dimensional fame? It can’t be true!

“Of course not I just ment you.” said Ed.

SERGIO (imitating Edward): Whatever a ment is, transforming you into one was worth losing my other arm!

“Oh.” Said Conan.

“Since it’s getting late you should stay with us.” Said Ed.

“Ok.” Said Conan.

Conan folows Ed and Al to there house.

“So Conan What’s your phone number?” Asked Ed.

“603-744-1221.” Said Conan.

SERGIO: So, now phones are inter-dimensional?
COROLLA: In my home continuum, yes.
SERGIO: It means that they stole Nanoha’s phone? I hope that this thing ends now with “And Nanoha blew them up with Starlight Breaker”.

Ed calls the number.

Ran answers the phone.

COROLLA: Agents are bored.

“Hello this Ran.” Said Ran.

“Um hey this is Edward erlic and since it’s pretty late I’m have Conan stay the night I just wanted to let you know.” Said Ed.

“Ok thank you bye.” Said Ran.

COROLLA (imitating Ran): I am not worried. After all, Conan is only sleeping at a perfect stranger’s home.

“Ok time to go to sleep guys.” Said Ed.

“Hey Conan you are the same height as me so I think my pajamas will fit you floow me.” Said al.

SERGIO: You “floow” me?

Conan floows Al.

COROLLA: Seems that the author knows what the verb “to floow” means.
SERGIO: Maybe it’s “to follow something that flows”.

“What is your favorite color?” Asked Al.

“Blue.” Said Conan.

Sergio gets up and points a finger at the screen
SERGIO (imitating Phoenix Wright): OBJECTION! His favourite color is red! I have the evidence to prove that!

“Ok here you can use the bathroom it’s across the hall.” Said Al.

SERGIO (imitating Alphonse): You know, that bathroom is only for people who like the color blue.

Conan goes into the bathroom changes then goes back to al’s room.

“I guess you favorite color is red.” Said Conan.

COROLLA (imitating Conan) It’s the best thing I can guess today. And I feel like somebody is playing with my mind.

“Yep so is my brother’s.” Said Al.

“Night guys.” Said Ed.

“Goodnight brother.”Said Al.

“Goodnight Ed.” Said Conan.

“Ok the guest bed in my bedroom is on the right.”Said Al.

SERGIO (imitating Alphonse): In my brother’s room is on the left. Pay attention.

They get in thier beds.

“Goodnight conan.”Said al.

“Goodnight Al.” Said Conan.

COROLLA: Goodnight everybody.

Al’s alarm goes off.

SERGIO: And by “goes off”, we mean “blows up”.
COROLLA: You’re going to become trigger-happy again. Please, calm down.

They get up chnge and go downstaris where ed is making breakfeast.

“Ok so Conan after breakfeast we find away to get you back where you came from.’ Said Ed.

SERGIO (imitating Edward): I want to get rid of you fast. So this fanfiction will end.

“Ok.”Said Conan.

They finish eating.

“Ok let’s head out.”Said Ed.

“Lead the way conan.”Said Al.

COROLLA: Sure, Conan doesn’t know the place and he has to lead.
SERGIO: Do not look for logic in badfics. There isn’t.

They go outside and Conan leads the way and they stop in front of the portal.

“So is this portal is how you got here?”Asked Ed.

“Yes.”Said Conan.

“Then it should help you get back.”Said al.

They all go throught the portal.

Ran runs over to Conan.

SERGIO: “Runs over?” He’s short, but he is not invisible. Poor Conan.
COROLLA (imitating Conan a la Edward): WHO IS THE BOY SO SMALL YOU CANNOT SEE HIM?

She looks at ed.

“Thank you for keeping him safe.”Said ran.

Al and ed go back to there world.

Sergio sighs in relief.
SERGIO: It’s over. Short, but very annoying.
COROLLA: Yes. It’s like whoever wrote it was uninspired and didn’t even bother to spell-check.
SERGIO: You think, Corolla? I thought it could be a trollfic. I mean, it’s so bad!
COROLLA: It can be, true. But I think we will never know.
SERGIO: Not that it would matter for us, however. Badfics are badfics, full stop.
They exit from the theater, still complaining about the fic.